Saturday, January 5, 2013

Max Tell / Max Tell Songs / 12 Samples


Song List

Vomit Comet . . . 1
The Pirate Couldn't Keep His Parts . . . 2
The Best Mommy . . . 3
sWhat's Your Game . . . 4
Little Larry Light House . . . 5
Cat in My Hoody . . . 6
I'm the Boogyman . . . 7
Monster Under My Bed . . . 8
Animal Crackers in My Soup . . . 9
I'm an Astro - Not . . . 10
Don’t Walk a Mile with a Crocodile . . . 11
Waves On the Water . . . 12

* Arrangement available

1)Vomit Comet

Roller coasters come and go
But over time, each seems too slow.
Then a miracle transpires
As a rocket's jet fuel fires.

   Take a ride on the Vomit Comet
   Sky high on a roller coaster ride.
   Jekyll & Hyde will write a sonnet 
   Sky high on a roller coaster ride.

This deep space activity
Feeling anti gravity,
Like a rocket pilot ace
In first place in the space race. 

   Take a ride on the Vomit Comet
   Sky high on a roller coaster ride.
   Jekyll & Hyde will write a sonnet 
   Sky high on a roller coaster ride.

Like a dream on soaring wings
Like a cat when it springs.
Like a tiger burning bright
Through an effervescent night.

Bridge:
Coney Island's where it started 
None could face it if faint hearted.
But now it's time to sore much higher
On the Vomit Comet Flyer.

Close your eyes, feel the rush
Slow at first, then the thrust
A single ride is just the start.
Again, again, with soring heart.

   Take a ride on the Vomit Comet
   Sky high on a roller coaster ride.
   Jekyll & Hyde will write a sonnet 
   Sky high on a roller coaster ride.

(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell


2) The Pirate Couldn't Keep His Parts

Once I met Crooksank Sue,
"By dead man's dinner, I hate your stew."
"You fork-jawed jigger," then her sword she drew
And lopped off my leg well above my shoe.

They call me Peg Leg Pete,
Now, I limp up and down the street.
I dance with a clunk
A clink, clank, clunk
And I sweat with the smell
Of an old dead skunk
.

One Eyed Brook had a gruesome look,
He wrote a book called The One Eyed Cook.
"Stop your gawkin', you gobble-de-gook."
He cut off my hand, now I have a hook.

Now, I'm Captain Hook with a brand new look
I'm Peg Leg Pete, that's not so neat.
Now, I limp up and down the street.
I dance with a clunk
A clink, clank, clunk
And I sweat with the smell
Of an old dead skunk
.

Black Beard looked me in the eye.
His ginger beer was down and dry.
He swung his sword, he wasn't shy.
Now, I'm One Eyed Jack, my, oh, my.

BRIDGE:
Ahoy, mateys, I'm a bloodthirsty pirate.
My heart is as black as coal.
Ahoy, mateys, I'm a bloodthirsty pirate.
My meanness is on a roll.

I'm One Eyed Jack, I don't like that,
I'm Captain Hook with a brand new look,
I'm Peg Leg Pete, that's not so neat,
Now, I limp up and down the street.
I dance with a clunk
A clink, clank, clunk
And I sweat with the smell
Of an old dead skunk.
Peee-yooooo!



(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell


3) The Best Mommy 
(in the Whole Wide World)

My Mommy's awesome.
She's alright,
The best of the best,

She's dinamite.


   My Mommy's the best Mommy
   In the whole wide world.
   My Mommy's the best Mommy
   In the whole wide world.

She's so sweet, she's the best.
She'd get A's on a Best Mom test.
I like her smiles, her giggles too.
With hide and seek, she says, "Boo."

   My Mommy's the best Mommy
   In the whole wide world.
   My Mommy's the best Mommy
   In the whole wide world.

   BRIDGE
   She's so cool, She's so fine.
   We play tickles all the time.
   Dad says, "Darling, you're sublime."
   I love my Mommy all the time.

I like her cuddles. I like he hugs.
When we snuggle, she calls me Nugs.
I like her stories, I like her songs.
When she sings, I sing along.

   My Mommy's the best Mommy
   In the whole wide world.
   My Mommy's the best Mommy
   In the whole wide world.


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell 

4) sWhat's Your Game

   sWhere are you goin'?
   sWhat's your name?
   sWhat are you up to'?
   sWhat's your game?

I'd like to meet you.
Sing some songs.
Please join in,
Cone on, sing along.

   sWhat are you Doin'?
   sWhat's your name?
   sWhere are you goin'?
   sWhat's your game.

I'm lookin' for a friend.
Just like you.
To start a game
We can start with two.

   sWhat are you Doin'?
   sWhat's your name?
   sWhere are you goin'?
   sWhat's your game.

I'm a new neighbour, 
From the West End,
New at school,
Now your best friend. 


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell


5) Little Larry Light House

Little Larry Light House
Lived upon a rock.
He loved all the seagulls.
He wished to join the flock.

     He wished that he could fly all day
     And sore across the sky,
     But he was stuck upon a rock,
     It almost made him cry.
     It almost made him cry.

Little Larry Light House
He shone his light due west.
He also shone it eastward.
He always did his best.

     But wished that he could fly all day
     And sore across the sky,
     While he was stuck upon a rock,
     It almost made him cry.
     It almost made him cry.

Little Larry Lighthouse
One night was in a fog.
All that he could think about
Was all that foggy smog.

     But then it happened, what a wonder,
     A ship in peril soon to blunder,
     Little Larry shone his light.
     He saved the day that very night.
     He saved the day that very night.

Now Little Larry Lights house
Lives upon that stone.
He waves to all the seagulls
And always feels at home.
Yes, he always feels at home.

(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell

6) Cat in my Hoody *                         
There are cats. There are cats. Some are so unique;
How they live, how they play, And where they like to sleep.   
                              
Chorus:
Got a cat in my hoody, a cat on my back.                                    
Got a cat in my hoody, a cat on my back.           
Got a cat in my hoody, a cat on my back.
                She’s got a sweet me-ow.  

My feline is one of a kind. You’ll never find one just like mine.
The only place she’ll hit the sack is in my hoody on my back.

Chorus:

She never catnaps in a box, or in a suitcase with my socks.
The only place she'll take a snooze, is in my hoody while I cruise.

Bridge: 
What a cat, she's quite the craze.        
What a cat, in her PJ's.
What a cat!  Imagine that,
My hoody cat knows where it's at.

She never cuddles on my bed, unless she’s sleeping on my head.
Her mind, you see, is all her own, my hoody is her snoozing zone.

Chorus:
Got a cat in my hoody, a cat on my back.                     
Got a cat in my hoody, a cat on my back.           
Got a cat in my hoody, a cat on my back.
                She’s got a sweet
                She’s got a sweet
                She’s got a sweet me-ow.


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell 

7) I'm the Boogyman *

I'm the Boogyman
The Boog-boog-boggyman.
I'm the Boogy,
But a friend, I am.

You won't find me,
Creepin' through the night.
You won't find me,
Filling kids with fright.
I Don't hide in the shadows
Covered with blood,
I'm not a spook.
I like to give kids hugs.

I'm the Boogyman
The Boog-boog-boggyman.
I'm the Boogy,
But a friend, I am.

I don't eat flesh.
Don't like bats.
Don't live in caves.
With the rats.
I like milk 
Chocolate too.
I like kids
Just like you.

I'm a friend, I am. 
I'm a friend, I am.
I'm the Boogy,
But a friend, I am.

So, If you get
Scared at night,
There's no need 
To click the light.
Call me up.
I'll be there.
We'll give those ghools 
A great big scare.

Cause, 
I'm the Boogyman
The Boog-boog-boggyman.
I'm the Boogy,
But, a friend, I am.

(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell

8) Monster Under My Bed *
                                        

I found a monster under my bed. 
One big toe stuck out of his head.
He was mean. 
You should have heard him scream.

                                        
He cried, Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,
            I'll scare your dad, I'll spook your mum.  
            Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,
I'll blow you up like bubble gum.

I found a monster in my sink.  
Dirty water, he began to drink.
He was mean. 
You should have heard him scream.

He cried, Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,

            I'll scare your dad, I'll spook your mum.  

            Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,

I'll blow you up like bubble gum.

I found a monster in my shoe,   
Blink my eyes, then there were two.
They were mean. 
You should have heard them scream.

                                          
He cried, Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,
            I'll scare your dad, I'll spook your mum.  
            Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,
I'll blow you up like bubble gum.

I found a monster IN my bed. 
One big toe stuck out of his head.
He was mean. 
You should have heard meeeee screeeeeam.

                              
No more 
Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,
            I'm known as monster number one.
            No more Fe-Fi-Fo-Fum,
            It's time for sleep, fright night is done.


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell


9) Animal Crackers in My Soup

    Animal crackers in my soup,
    Animal crackers in my soup,
    What a hoot, they're good to scoop.
    Animal crackers in my soup.

A monkey, a rhino, a seal and a sheep,
Bowl to spoon, so neat to eat.
A bison, a camel and a giraffe
I wish I could eat them in the bath.

    Bridge
    Animal crackers, when I can't sleep
    I count crackers instead of sheep.
    But better yet is in my bowl
    Yummy in my tummy, till I grow old.

The koala's my fave, the zebra too.
I can't leave out the kangaroo.
Then there's the elephant and the gorilla.
Perhaps next year they'll add Godzilla.

    Animal crackers in my soup,
    Animal crackers in my soup,
    One last scoop goes down the shoot.
    Animal crackers in my soup.

I've got a jungle in my bowl
But, something's missing, a giant troll,
Lions and tigers and bears, oh my,
But where's the eagle from the sky?

    Animal crackers in my soup,
    Animal crackers in my soup,
    What a hoot, I go loop de loop
    For animal crackers in my soup.

(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell



10) I'm an Astro - Not

I'm an astro - not.
I'm an astro - not.
Do dreams come true
For me and you?
No, I'm an astro - not.

I wish I were an astronaut
Flying up in space.
I'd meet the man in the moon
I'd meet him face to face.


I'm an astro - not.

I'm an astro - not.
Do dreams come true
For me and you?
No, I'm an astro - not.

But if I wish upon a star
And focus on the moon
Even farther, maybe mars,
To the universe, I'lll zoom.

Cause wishing is what makes us fly
In our hearts or to the sky
Wishing, dreaming builds beginnings
In the end they lead to winnings.

So . . .


I'm an astronaut.

I'm an astronaut.
The only way a wish comes true,
Is to take the path dreams lead us to.


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell

11) Don’t Walk a Mile with a Crocodile

Don’t walk a mile with a crocodile,
'Cause he’ll never give an inch.
He’ll smile for awhile that crocodile,
Then he’ll give you a little pinch.
He’ll suck your toes, then nibble your nose.
He’ll ask, “Do you like ice cream?”
Don’t get caught. You’re in for a shock.
If he winks, you’d better scream.

     A croc is mean,
     Has poor hygiene,
     And he's the Dean of the Mean Machine.
'Cause a crocodile has a crooked smile
And he licks his lips when hungry.
He's a fine reptile with a brain like bile,
Especially on Monday.
His teeth are sharp, like his best friend Shark,
Sickled, they can chew through steel.
A little mustard dabbed with custard,
You're his favourite meal.

     A croc is mean,
     Has poor hygiene,
     And he's the Dean of the Mean Machine.
So don’t be turned and don’t get burned
By the fire in a croc’s red eyes.
Don’t you roam, head for home.
Don’t listen to his lies.
'Cause a croc, he has one small thought.
It’s not a thought that’s new.
It’s a thought in his head that he takes to bed,
The thought of his teeth in you .

     BRIGDE
     He likes things yummy
     A little gummy,
     Yummy in his crummy tummy.
You on toast, he likes the most,
As his innards start to grumble.
If he cracks a smile, don’t yak awhile.
Run like heck, don’t stumble.
Don’t walk a mile with a crocodile.
A croc, he can't be trusted.
If he says, “We're friends to the very end.”
Don't listen, or you’ll be busted.

     A croc is mean,
     Has poor hygiene,
     And he's the Dean of the Mean Machine.
     A croc is mean,
     Has poor hygiene
     And he's the Dean, yes the Dean of Mean.


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell


12) Waves on the Water *

There are waves on the water.
Do you know why?
How can all those waves get dry?

There are waves on the water.
Do you know why?
How can all those waves get dry? 

There are gulls on the water.
Do you know why?
Can seagulls bake a cherry pie?

There are gulls on the water.
Do you know why?
Can seagulls bake a cherry pie?
            And how can all those waves get dry?

There are crabs in the water?
Do you know why?
If you pinch a crab will he start to cry?

There are crabs in the water?
Do you know why?
If you pinch a crab will he start to cry?
            Can a seagull bake a cherry pie?
            And how can all those waves get dry?

There are fish in the water.
Do you know why?
When a fishy sleeps, where does she lie?

There are fish in the water.
Do you know why?
When a fishy sleeps, where does she lie?
            If you pinch a crab will he start to cry?
Can a seagull bake a cherry pie?
            And how can all those waves get dry?

Oh no! A shark! (spoken)

There are sharks in the water.
Do you know why,
A shark has teeth and one glass eye?

There are sharks in the water.
Do you know why,
A shark has teeth and one glass eye?
            When a fishy sleeps, where does she lie?
If you pinch a crab will he start to cry?
Can a seagull bake a cherry pie?
            And how can all those waves get . . . 
How can all those waves get . . .
How can all those waves get dry?


(c) Robert Stelmach 2012
a.k.a. Max Tell



More Reading:



What would you like to know more about? Rhythm? Rhyme? Anything of your choice? Do you have a question about poetry? Your comments would be greatly appreciated.


Bye for now and see you soon.



Have a great writing day.



Max
PS: Like writing, but love editing.





2 comments:

  1. Absolutely delightful! And brilliant. Thanks for the morning laugh -- you make me feel like a pid again...

    ReplyDelete
  2. Thaureen, mank you ever so thuch.

    ReplyDelete